im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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