My friends, they love my intelligence
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
