You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
