I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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