the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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