Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize
