can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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