i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
