The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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