Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize