"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
