tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
