That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
