I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
