Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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