whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
