Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
We are all done wearing pants today
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
