He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Is it penis luge time yet?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize