one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
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