Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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