So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
no you cant smoke seaweed
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
