Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
