i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
