I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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