Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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