bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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