Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize