Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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