She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I understand Curling. That high.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize
