i jhust puked up my retainher.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Randomize
