I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
