Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
