That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Randomize