We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
this must be what syphilis tastes like
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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