last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
we should paint friendship bongs
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
