I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
