Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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