3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
