Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
