Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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