at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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