He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize