didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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