you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
