Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
