The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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