THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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