one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
