I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
