I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
