she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Operation Purity has been aborted
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
